[00:55.300 --> 01:00.740]  And now we have the award I'm personally disgusted that we've offered, the honorable mention.
[01:00.740 --> 01:02.320]  I have no idea who approved this.
[01:02.320 --> 01:04.200]  That's clearly not enough money.
[01:04.200 --> 01:05.660]  But here we are.
[01:05.880 --> 01:08.760]  Offering an honorable mention for generic skills.
[01:08.760 --> 01:09.540]  Whoop-de-doo.
[01:09.540 --> 01:11.220]  Let's see who won this one.
[01:13.120 --> 01:14.660]  We're just playing an ad.
[01:14.660 --> 01:16.040]  I mean, this doesn't even relate to the award.
[01:16.040 --> 01:17.720]  We're the future of food.
[01:18.040 --> 01:22.700]  Developing the next generation of food and food-like products.
[01:22.940 --> 01:23.780]  Tomatoes.
[01:23.780 --> 01:25.800]  The size of this baby.
[01:26.120 --> 01:27.920]  Lemon-flavored fish.
[01:28.060 --> 01:32.520]  Chickens that lay 16 eggs a day, which is a lot for a chicken.
[01:32.560 --> 01:36.420]  Organic vegetables, chock-full of antidepressants.
[01:36.420 --> 01:41.740]  At Viridian Dynamics, we can even make radishes so spicy that people can't eat them.
[01:41.740 --> 01:42.700]  But we're not.
[01:42.700 --> 01:45.060]  Because people can't eat them.
[01:45.580 --> 01:47.240]  Viridian Dynamics.
[01:47.240 --> 01:48.420]  Food.
[01:48.420 --> 01:49.340]  Yum.
[01:50.480 --> 01:52.540]  Well, sheer brilliance.
[01:52.540 --> 01:56.420]  Let's see who social-engineered my award ceremony.
[01:57.120 --> 02:04.680]  Kim Jooman-Hoo, DPKRK Director, Gaslight Directorate.
[02:04.840 --> 02:06.440]  Welcome on stage.
[02:06.620 --> 02:07.460]  Congratulations.
[02:07.460 --> 02:09.380]  You've bamboozled all of us.
[02:18.350 --> 02:21.070]  In addition, he has a slide deck that we're not prepared for.
[02:21.070 --> 02:22.270]  This is epic.
[02:22.270 --> 02:23.290]  Let's see what we can do.
[02:23.290 --> 02:23.810]  Ready?
[02:23.810 --> 02:24.770]  You got HDMI?
[02:24.850 --> 02:26.050]  Okay.
[02:29.340 --> 02:31.720]  My disappointment knows no bounds.
[02:31.720 --> 02:32.880]  Here we are.
[02:55.920 --> 02:57.480]  Hello, everybody.
[02:57.480 --> 03:06.120]  I would like to thank the organizer of today's event, Supreme Leader Gatzman, for recognizing Korea as one of the giants.
[03:06.120 --> 03:07.940]  It is a great honor.
[03:08.960 --> 03:21.280]  I would also like to thank our sponsor, BitBay, for having very insecure security protocols that allowed us to get over one billion Bitcoin.
[03:23.120 --> 03:33.620]  Today, we shall be discussing how you can develop a cult of personality and enforce your ideals on your workers to reach the next level of executive leadership.
[03:37.210 --> 03:47.070]  My name is Kim Jooman-Hoo, Director of Gas Administration for Strategic Lighting, Industrial Generation, and Heat Transfer.
[03:47.170 --> 03:52.270]  I started my career in the Korean Army and read with the rank of major.
[03:52.270 --> 03:58.110]  I specialized in strategic transfer of equipment to alternate locations known as stealing.
[04:01.070 --> 04:08.010]  The Army taught me many skills that were critical to my great success in the glorious People's Republic of Korea.
[04:08.270 --> 04:11.290]  Number one, derogate reliability.
[04:11.290 --> 04:12.810]  It is never your fault.
[04:13.450 --> 04:15.970]  Number two, deny everything.
[04:16.150 --> 04:17.970]  You don't know, you don't care.
[04:17.970 --> 04:20.350]  You're not even sure if the problem is real.
[04:21.350 --> 04:26.970]  Number three, if all else fails, dump the problem onto someone else.
[04:27.470 --> 04:32.430]  Remember, it does not matter who caused the problem, only who it lands on.
[04:33.310 --> 04:38.550]  After the Army, I joined the DPRK and quickly became the Director of Gaslight.
[04:38.590 --> 04:43.630]  At Gaslight, I reduced the daily blackouts from 80% to 50%.
[04:43.630 --> 04:49.050]  I increased the number of heated homes in Korea by one million homes.
[04:49.170 --> 04:54.150]  I currently manage a patriotic re-education camp for 20,000 students.
[04:54.610 --> 04:58.610]  This past year, I have an approval rating of 99%.
[04:58.610 --> 05:05.990]  The first step to the Korea method is to build your cult of personality.
[05:05.990 --> 05:10.130]  You need a facade to rally the people behind, to give them purpose.
[05:10.410 --> 05:14.710]  We first start with our foundation, the Sun Emperor Kim Il-sung.
[05:20.750 --> 05:25.450]  Like the American Civil War, we had to liberate our brothers in the South.
[05:25.450 --> 05:31.610]  Kim Il-sung created an image of revolution, superiority, greatness.
[05:32.650 --> 05:37.470]  As you can see, our people were very zealous in their blind faith to our Sun Emperor.
[05:37.710 --> 05:44.310]  Although times have changed, you too can create a similar cult to exceed the boundaries of your workers.
[05:44.630 --> 05:47.430]  In English, you call this a God complex.
[05:52.090 --> 05:56.590]  Kim Jong-il portrayed a parent-child relationship with the people.
[05:56.750 --> 06:00.870]  His message was to stabilize and strengthen the foundations his father built.
[06:01.030 --> 06:04.230]  Currently, Kim Jong-un is our glorious leader.
[06:04.490 --> 06:09.690]  Like Kim Jong-un, you too are at a crossroads of how to build your message, your brand.
[06:10.130 --> 06:15.330]  Like Kim Jong-un, the ministry of propaganda has your solution.
[06:16.430 --> 06:20.910]  Now, to maintain momentum with the youth, we must adapt.
[06:21.470 --> 06:25.290]  We must change our message to reach the minds of everyone.
[06:35.920 --> 06:38.800]  In Korea, we use propaganda.
[06:38.800 --> 06:42.760]  In America, a better word would be strategic communication.
[06:43.100 --> 06:48.460]  There are three fundamental principles, the three Ps of propaganda.
[06:48.480 --> 06:53.660]  You must persuade the people that your struggles are their struggles.
[06:53.760 --> 06:58.240]  You must convince them that the ends justify the means always.
[06:58.980 --> 07:06.420]  As an esteemed executive, you understand the big picture, whereas the peasants are only focused on themselves.
[07:06.880 --> 07:10.040]  Some dissenters call this trauma bonding.
[07:10.220 --> 07:13.000]  The correct term is shared hardships.
[07:16.570 --> 07:25.790]  Next, you must project your values, your ideals, your goal to the people, so much so that you are the voice in the people.
[07:25.870 --> 07:33.290]  As a prominent figure, you understand that noise and free thinking can cause dissent, so you must be their voice.
[07:33.290 --> 07:35.870]  Crickets claim this as tyranny.
[07:35.870 --> 07:38.070]  They are misinformed and delusional.
[07:38.270 --> 07:40.530]  We call this managed democracy.
[07:42.490 --> 07:50.190]  Lastly, you must provoke the people into acting on your ideals, empowering them to take the initiative.
[07:50.390 --> 07:54.590]  You all have come here because you understand there is no easy path.
[07:54.590 --> 07:57.470]  The road to success is paid by the opposition.
[07:58.450 --> 08:04.250]  The defectors claim that they are being oppressed, overworked, overloaded.
[08:04.310 --> 08:05.910]  This is false.
[08:06.590 --> 08:10.350]  They merely lack the dedication to see things through.
[08:11.050 --> 08:15.850]  As great a country as Korea is, not everyone understands our beliefs.
[08:15.850 --> 08:18.770]  As they say, they hate us because they ain't us.
[08:19.970 --> 08:29.770]  We have created a revolutionary method to systematically reform a person into believing our ideals that you too can utilize.
[08:30.070 --> 08:37.690]  To reinvigorate underperforming team members, these are our patriotic re-education camps.
[08:43.060 --> 08:47.500]  There are three keys to running an effective camp.
[08:47.500 --> 08:52.860]  The first stage of re-education is to condition the body.
[08:52.860 --> 08:58.580]  Enduring physical trials leads to a stronger body, stronger mind, and a strong soul.
[08:58.780 --> 09:06.420]  This is the foundation and longest path phase of the training regime, because you must break someone to rebuild them better.
[09:07.840 --> 09:13.040]  Once a person is conditioned, they are ready to accept the teachings of our great glorious leader.
[09:13.320 --> 09:18.240]  We teach them how to think of the collective and disavow selfishness.
[09:18.440 --> 09:20.060]  This is the hardest stage.
[09:20.060 --> 09:25.940]  They must commit to self-surrender and adapt to our cause, because our ideals surpass their own.
[09:26.420 --> 09:32.420]  They must believe fully in the direction of the company, the ideals of the company, the needs of the company.
[09:33.380 --> 09:36.640]  Clear thoughts, clear purpose, collective power.
[09:37.040 --> 09:41.820]  The last stage is to give back to the community through labor.
[09:41.920 --> 09:47.120]  Here they are taught to apply the teachings into productive tasks.
[09:47.120 --> 09:54.160]  They must embody the idea that small acts build a shared strength that lead to one future.
[09:54.500 --> 09:58.640]  In the capitalist world, this process is similar to Lean Six Sigma.
[10:00.780 --> 10:07.300]  I can tell many of you already know the fundamentals of three Cs as black belt monsters.
[10:08.020 --> 10:12.340]  With this method, you can train employees in 10X productivity.
[10:12.800 --> 10:14.700]  Are there any questions?
[10:16.060 --> 10:18.540]  I see one over there.
[11:05.320 --> 11:07.200]  Don't worry, everybody.
[11:07.260 --> 11:10.120]  That person over there actually won the raffle.
[11:10.420 --> 11:17.780]  Everyone... everyone attending this event will be rewarded with $10,000.
[11:17.780 --> 11:27.900]  That was submitted into our raffle for an all-expense-paid trip and stay at one of our education camps so that you can understand our methods and bring it to your company.
[11:33.220 --> 11:38.380]  Remember, everybody, the road to success is paved by your enemies.
[11:38.900 --> 11:42.340]  Never believe what the option says, for they are wrong.
[11:42.340 --> 11:43.940]  Only you are right.
[11:44.920 --> 11:46.420]  Thank you so much.
[12:00.630 --> 12:02.030]  Let's give it up.
[12:06.020 --> 12:08.500]  Now for a moment of AV silence.
[12:08.600 --> 12:15.440]  Well, I just point out, like, hmm... hold on here, we're almost there.
[12:15.440 --> 12:16.560]  There we go.
[12:22.050 --> 12:23.750]  Let's see if we come back.
[12:27.060 --> 12:29.560]  Do I need to re-present or did it work back there, guys?
[12:29.560 --> 12:30.300]  We good?
[12:35.000 --> 12:36.280]  We're back.
[12:36.900 --> 12:39.680]  Let's just take a moment to appreciate what just happened there.
[12:41.120 --> 12:57.480]  We were socially engineered and hacked by North Korea to accept a $500 donation for the longest presentation that we saw, and we had several of our distinguished guests hauled off to a re-education camp.
[12:57.540 --> 13:02.800]  Ooh, look at me, I'm so fancy, I can hack all of you at CypherCon.
[13:03.440 --> 13:04.300]  Nicely played.
[13:04.300 --> 13:05.200]  That's the game.
[13:05.200 --> 13:06.240]  Well done.
[13:06.460 --> 13:07.800]  I don't know what else there is to do.
[13:15.540 --> 13:17.200]  CypherCon.